My wife is introducing my daughter to Fiddler on the Roof tonight. It is a great movie, one I forget how much I enjoy until I see it again. One of the main plotlines revolves around a man handling the marrying off of his three eldest daughters. It started my thinking down a path that I have spent many recent months on.
What makes a man a good father? What small decisions on a day to day basis lead to the difference between Ward Cleaver and Michael Lohan? What is my role? Am I the provider? The disciplinarian? The joker? The friend? The teacher?
I know the truth is found amidst all of these traits and more, but how to maintain that balance and still raise a successful, well-adjusted daughter is the mystery that I can't seem to solve. Most days I feel like a complete failure. Some days I go to sleep feeling like I did okay. I have never felt like I totally nailed it. I can only hope that this constant feeling of missing the mark will continue to spur me on to getting better each day.
It has become so very clear to me that my primary purpose on this earth, at least for now, is raising Ryley to be the best woman that she can be, to show her what the world holds for her, and encourage her that nothing that she wants out of life is unattainable. And as terrible as I am at that purpose on so many days, I remain dedicated to see it through. God has great plans for her, and that makes my job all the more crucial. I can't screw it up.
Ryley is beautiful. She is smart, funny, adventurous, and loving. Everything that I celebrate in her as my daughter is everything that will in just a few years attract boys, and later men, who will want to make that wonderfulness their own. And if I have raised her right, and she is a little lucky, and God keeps her safe, she will maintain her precious virtue until marriage. And assuming I'm a part of the conversation with whomever proposes to her, as I so much want to be, I don't know how I will have the wisdom to help her separate the wheat from the chaff. Because that is what my role will be in that moment. To reasonably and clear-headedly appraise his strengths and weaknesses, without the cloudy vision that love will have given to Ryley.
How will I trust that some boy will take care of her for the rest of her life as she deserves to be taken care of? How will I know that he holds her happiness above his own well-being? How can I be sure he is the right one for her?
How will I let her go?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment